What is assertive communication you may be asking yourself, but wht is assertive communication?
Assertiveness is the quality of being self-assured and confident without being aggressive. In the field of psychology and psychotherapy, it is a learnable skill and mode of communication.
Dorland’s Medical Dictionary defines assertiveness as:
a form of behavior characterized by a confident declaration or affirmation of a statement without need of proof; this affirms the person’s rights or point of view without either aggressively threatening the rights of another (assuming a position of dominance) or submissively permitting another to ignore or deny one’s rights or point of view.
During the second half of the 20th century, assertiveness was increasingly singled out as a behavioral skill taught by many personal development experts, behavior therapists, and cognitive behavioral therapists.
Assertiveness is often linked to self-esteem. The term and concept was popularized to the general public by books such as Your Perfect Right: A Guide to Assertive Behavior (1970) by Robert E. Alberti and Michael L. Emmons and When I Say No, I Feel Guilty: How To Cope Using the Skills of Systematic Assertiveness Therapy (1975) by Manuel J. Smith.
The goals of assertiveness training include:
increased awareness of personal rights
differentiation between non-assertiveness and assertiveness
differentiation between passive–aggressiveness and aggressiveness
learning both verbal and non-verbal assertiveness skills.
As a communication style and strategy, assertiveness is thus distinguished from both aggression and passivity.
How people deal with personal boundaries, their own and those of other people, helps to distinguish between these three concepts.
Passive communicators do not defend their own personal boundaries and thus allow aggressive people to abuse or manipulate them through fear.
Passive communicators are also typically not likely to risk trying to influence anyone else.
Aggressive people do not respect the personal boundaries of others and thus are liable to harm others while trying to influence them.
A person communicates assertively by overcoming fear of speaking his or her mind or trying to influence others, but doing so in a way that respects the personal boundaries of others.
Assertive people are also willing to defend themselves against aggressive people.
Do you know how Learning Happens, because many don’t fully appreciate the processes that go into learning, nor the events that actually constitute learning.
Learning is the process of acquiring new or modifying existing knowledge, behaviors, skills, values, or preferences.
The ability to learn is possessed by humans, animals, and some machines, and there is also evidence for some kind of learning in some plants.
Some learning is immediate, induced by a single event (e.g. being burned by something hot), but much skill and knowledge accumulates from repeated experiences. The changes induced by learning often last a lifetime, and it is hard to distinguish learned material that seems to be “lost” from that which cannot be retrieved.
Human learning begins before birth and continues until death as a consequence of ongoing interactions between person and environment.
Active learning occurs when a person takes control of his/her learning experience, since understanding information is the key aspect of learning, it is important for learners to recognise what they understand and what they do not.
By doing so, they can monitor their own mastery of subjects. Active learning encourages learners to have an internal dialogue in which they verbalize understandings.
This and other meta-cognitive strategies can be taught to a child over time. Studies within metacognition have proven the value in active learning, claiming that the learning is usually at a stronger level as a result.
In addition, learners have more incentive to learn when they have control over not only how they learn but also what they learn.
Active learning is a key characteristic of student-centered learning, conversely, passive learning and direct instruction are characteristics of teacher-centered learning (or traditional education).
Informal, or accidental learning has massive potential to give meaning, relevance and context to the ideas that more formal learning offers.
Many of us confuse learning with an accumulation of knowledge. This video explains in an unconventional way how learning ‘really’ happens.
The term microadventure was made common by British adventurer and author Alastair Humphreys and is defined as an overnight outdoor adventure that is “small and achievable, for normal people with real lives”.
The New York Times described a microadventure as “short, perspective-shifting bursts of travel closer to home, inspiring followers to pitch a tent in nearby woods, explore their city by moonlight, or hold a family slumber party in the backyard.”
The concept is flexible enough in its definition to allow the individual to choose the location, duration, and overall scope of the adventure.
Microadventures are generally considered affordable in that little to no specialized gear is required, travel costs are trivial or nonexistent, and only a minimal amount of provisions are needed for the outing.
Often participants will sleep out under the stars using a bivvy bag, rather than a tent, and wild swims are actively encouraged. Microadventures have proved popular with people whose lives are busy with work and/or family commitments.
How to help every child to fulfil their potential – ever wondered why kids say they’re bored at school, or why they stop trying when the work gets harder?
Educationalist Carol Dweck explains how the wrong kind of praise actually *harms* young people.
This short video is essential viewing for EVERYONE – from teachers and education workers to relatives and friends – and will totally revolutionise the way you interact with children.
Some parents jump to the conclusion that their child is gifted, that the work is too easy for them and that is why they are bored.
Other parents jump to the conclusion that it is the teaching methods or the teacher not presenting the material in a way that engages the learners. While both of these are valid assumptions, they’re not the only reasons children get bored in school.
Generally, some of the reasons that children get bored in school is because they are:
Bright learners who don’t need a lot of instruction to master a skill or start out ahead of the rest of the class often complain of being bored at school. What they’re really telling you is they are not being challenged by the work in the classroom.
Learners who are under-challenged are not always gifted – there are specific qualifications for giftedness – but they are typically very capable and very smart. Surprisingly, these children don’t always appear that way. In fact, many under-challenged learners are sloppy in their work, don’t study much (though still get good grades) and tend to dash through their work without much in the way of editing or rechecking.
Under-motivated learners often complain of being bored in school, but not because they already know what’s being taught. This complaint is different. Often “school is boring” is paired with “that’s why I don’t do the work” or “that’s why I don’t pay attention.” An under-motivatedlearner is not the same as a lazy learner.
In some cases, the lack of motivation is tied into a feeling that what they are learning isn’t personally important, that the learning process has no meaning for them and their lives.
An inspiring talk about learning by Shahmeem Akhtar
To learn is to be free – Shameem Akhtar posed as a boy during her early childhood in Pakistan so she could enjoy the privileges Pakistani girls are rarely afforded: to play outside and attend school.
In an eye-opening, personal talk, Akhtar recounts how the opportunity to get an education altered the course of her life — and ultimately changed the culture of her village, where today every young girl goes to school.
Shameem Akhtar is a teacher working to empower girls in Sindh, a province in the southeast of Pakistan.
Shameem Akhtar is a dedicated and enthusiastic development professional, with special interest in the field of gender, education, social mobilization, emergency/relief, management and literature.
She is also engaged in research studies in rural development, doing PhD work at the University of Sindh.
She is a member of the Individual Land Organization (Friedrich Naumann Stiftung) and was selected by Acumen Pakistan Fellows 2015 for their one-year course.
Akhtar frequently contributes to print media and literary magazines, work that has brought her close to the study of important social issues like malnutrition, child labor, marginalization and other core problems of the province.
She has been active in the training of teachers, children, women and other segments of society in the fields of education, health, livelihood and disaster management under the banner of prestigious organizations in the social service sector.